Dr. Toast's Amazing World of Toast » Toast News

The Seventh Apocalyptic Church of the Toaster

drtoast — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 10:04:00 +0000

My good disciple Timmy ‘Twang’ Lowndes of Northern Ireland offers: “A Spiritual contemplation of all things toasted. Let us take time this day to celebrate all that can be placed within the sacramental toaster. Be it bread or crumpet, dark or light, we praise all that is warm and butter covered. Behold All Ye That Enter The Seventh Apocalyptic Church Of the Toaster, thee shall visit our revered prophet Dr. Toast.” Join now at Facebook.com!

World’s Highest Popping Toaster

drtoast — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 21:36:26 +0000

Did you know there is an official Guinness world record for “Highest Popping Toaster”? Well, meet the new record holder – the CO2 gas powered “Moaster“. An account of the successful record-breaking attempt can be found at Digital Lifestyles. And while the folks at Guinness recorded the trajectory at just 8.5 feet, the video shows that it actually appears to go several stories higher than that.

Texas-Shaped Toast on eBay

drtoast — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 02:18:28 +0000

Amy pointed me to this item on Valleywag: “A friend of an animator laid off from a recently imploded East Bay videogames startup writes to pimp the newly unemployed buddy’s latest venture: selling toast on eBay. But not just any toast — it’s toast that will be lovingly sculpted into the shape of each of America’s 50 great states. First up? Texas. You laugh now, but you won’t think it’s such a terrible idea when the recession has you out on the street and your options underwater.”

Image of Big Bang Seen in Piece of Toast

drtoast — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 01:25:54 +0000

Miracle toast? From the article: “Excitement is growing in the Northern England town of Huddlesfield following the news that a local man saw an image of the big-bang in a piece of toast. Atheist Donald Chapman, 36, told local newspaper The Huddlesfield Express that he was sitting down to eat breakfast when an unusual toast pattern caught his eye…”

Toast in 50 Seconds

Dr. Toast — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 04:02:56 +0000

The modern toaster takes an average of 141 seconds to make toast. I personally like to make use of this time to close my eyes, breathe deeply of the gently wafting aroma, perhaps compose a new toast haiku or two. But if you’re the busy high-powered executive type for whom an extra 90 seconds means just enough time to cancel the office Christmas party or to fire an underperforming subordinate or two, this Turbo Toaster boasts toast in under a minute by blowing superheated air onto that bewildered slice from two directions at once. Then you can gobble down your toast and conquer the world! Huzzah!

House of Toast

Dr. Toast — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 21:57:38 +0000

The House of Toast is celebrating its 13th year of business! Their development of proprietary technology such as the Toast-O-Matic XR-17 Deluxe Toasting Command Station, secret powdered toast re-hydration techniques, and their focus on principle-centered values have made them a worldwide leader in bread-based products. As if that weren’t enough, in demonstrating their excellent corporate citizenship, they have raised over $248,000 for Toast Intolerance Relief, and sponsored the House of Toast Curling Team at the International Restaurant Owners Curling Championship. Dr. Toast offers his best wishes for 13 more years of House of Toast!

iPhone’s Built-In Toaster Is Defective

Dr. Toast — Thu, 19 Jul 2007 01:32:08 +0000

Bad news for Apple. Mr Knutz said: “I was sold the iPhone as the perfect solution for satisfying all my breakfast time needs. I could read emails, surf the web, grill some bacon and do toast all at the same time with the one gadget. Well I can’t, the toast is rubbish.” via The Daily Mash.

A Toaster that Never Burns the Bread

Dr. Toast — Sun, 09 Oct 2005 07:39:26 +0000

“The device works by sucking in particles of caramelised bread and blowing them through an ionising sensor. In this sensor a small electrical current flows through an airborne path of ions, emitted by a pellet of radioactive americium-241. The ions attach themselves to any toast particles and reduce the strength of the current. You can set the toaster to switch off when the current drops by a specific amount according to how brown you like your toast.” Read the article!

9 for stupidity?

Dr. Toast — Thu, 18 Aug 2005 01:00:52 +0000

Today I was in Borders Books looking for a birthday gift and was perusing the “humor” section, when I came across a book titled “505 Unbelievably Stupid Web Pages.” Hmm, I thought, I wonder if my site is in there? So I flipped to the index and, lo and behold, there it is on page 228: “Dr. Toast’s Amazing World of Toast”.

“More goodness on a lightly crisped slice of bread. It’s Dr. Toast’s Amazing World of Toast, and the doctor answers all of your questions about toast, and some questions about other things. Features on this site include Toast haiku (haiku certainly is popular on the internet, isn’t it?), toast recipes, and an opportunity to ask the famous Dr. Toast himself a question. This site even has a link to the Toast Bible, with the Ten Commandments of Toast: “Thou shalt not place unnatural condiments on toast.” And, of course, “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s toast.” COMMENTS: I don’t see what’s so heavenly about a slightly crisped piece of bread. Why not Pop-Tarts? Or waffles? Toast is just so… plain. Still, the opportunity to ask somebody a question about food is worth the stupidity.
ABNORMALITY: 9 STUPIDITY: 9 ENTERTAINMENT: 7″

Awesome, I got a 9 for stupidity! Which is an appropriate opportunity for me to announce that last week I revamped the whole site – drtoast.com now solidifies its position as the internet’s definitive toast site. In addition to classic features such as Toast Haiku, Toast Recipes, and Ask Dr. Toast, there is now a Toast News department and the new Toast Forum, a gathering place for the toast community. I’ve also added a Music page, which has downloadable MP3s of some of the chill/downtempo music I produce. Enjoy the new face of drtoast.com.

Toaster PC runs BSD and makes toast

Dr. Toast — Thu, 11 Aug 2005 20:47:05 +0000

“The toaster really did work, and didn’t overheat the CPU! Just for fun, they also had control of the LEDs on the toaster. The keyboard was separate, connected via USB.”

links: news article, technical info