Dr. Toast's Amazing World of Toast

From the Chairman of B.U.T.T.E.R.

drtoast — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 19:57:43 +0000

Q: Thank you for your outstanding efforts to produce quality toast. You are an inspiration to all beings in the universe that appreciate the finer aspects of toast. We here at B.U.T.T.E.R. regard your presence as an indication that the cosmic collective consciousness is swinging towards equilibrium, and soon toast will be understood and appreciated for its universal relevance. Please keep up the good work and know that we will be watching for all future developments.

Thank You,

G. Blandston (_____@butter.net)
Chairman,
Bureau for Ultimate Tasting Toast Experimentation and Research

A: Dear Chairman Blandston,

And thank you for your kind and encouraging words. It’s important and challenging work that we do here at the University of Toast, and even with my lofty and intimidating title of Doctor of Toastronomical Sciences, there is still so much left for me to learn about toast, and indeed about myself, before my work is complete. I am honored, and only a little bit creeped out, to know that you will continue to monitor my work in the future, and I look forward to the possibility of collaborating with your Bureau in its own endeavors, without any of those pesky restraining orders.

Warmest Regards,

Dr. Toast

World’s Highest Popping Toaster

drtoast — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 21:36:26 +0000

Did you know there is an official Guinness world record for “Highest Popping Toaster”? Well, meet the new record holder - the CO2 gas powered “Moaster“. An account of the successful record-breaking attempt can be found at Digital Lifestyles. And while the folks at Guinness recorded the trajectory at just 8.5 feet, the video shows that it actually appears to go several stories higher than that.

Battlestar Galactica Toaster

drtoast — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 21:24:45 +0000

Here’s one for all the sci-fi geeks out there - a toaster that sears the image of a Cylon into your toast! What a great way to start the day! Courtesy of the Sci Fi Channel.

Dr. Toast Live @ EVAC

drtoast — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 21:46:35 +0000

Saturday, July 5th, 2008 - False Profit, LLC’s annual Life Quality Enhancement product, Priceless, was scheduled for release in Belden this coming weekend but has been recalled due to uncontained pre-apocalyptic wildfire. Insiders at the company are reporting that Priceless is now set for release later this summer. In response, False Profit’s Research and Development Brigade worked frantically for two days to develop a replacement product. False Profit’s first response to the statewide catastrophe, called EVAC!, is set to be unveiled at a warehouse location in San Francisco on Saturday, July 5th, 2008.

Dr. Toast Live @ Friends and Family 2008

drtoast — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 22:55:00 +0000

Friday, July 25 through Sunday, July 27 - Dr. Toast plays a special set by the pond on Friday night at the 12th annual Friends and Family campout in Mendocino County, CA. Comfy chill space, firelight and more. Camp & Sons is a beautiful retreat, complete with a communal kitchen, a pond, orchards, three hot tubs (two of which are wood-fired), a well-maintained lawn area for lounging, beautiful gardens, outdoor showers, and much more. Hope to see you there!

Dr. Toast Live @ Priceless 2008

drtoast — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 22:31:30 +0000

For the July 4th weekend, come join Dr. Toast on the beautiful Feather River in Belden, CA for the 3rd annual Priceless campout. Dr. Toast will be joined by such musical luminaries as Chris de Luca vs Phon.o, Tom Burbank, Vibesquad, Deru, and many others. Activities for the weekend will include a Dr. Seuss birthday party, merit badges, a flame tree workshop, hand percussion workshop, 4th of July bbq, free Sunday breakfast, and more! Additional info available at priceless.false-profit.com UPDATE: due to forest fires in California, Priceless is being rescheduled to September 26-28, 2008.

Texas-Shaped Toast on eBay

drtoast — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 02:18:28 +0000

Amy pointed me to this item on Valleywag: “A friend of an animator laid off from a recently imploded East Bay videogames startup writes to pimp the newly unemployed buddy’s latest venture: selling toast on eBay. But not just any toast — it’s toast that will be lovingly sculpted into the shape of each of America’s 50 great states. First up? Texas. You laugh now, but you won’t think it’s such a terrible idea when the recession has you out on the street and your options underwater.”

326 Ways to Enjoy Toast

drtoast — Sun, 01 Jun 2008 03:27:14 +0000

From the Breakfast Institute, the research division of MrBreakfast.com, comes this exhaustive list of ways to enjoy toast. Have you considered cranberry-jalapeno jam? Or artichoke dip, or pimento cheese spread, or tangy lime butter, or sauteed mushrooms and chives, or brie with maple syrup, or homemade vanilla sugar spread? Check out all 326!

The Toaster that Toasted the Golden Toast

drtoast — Sun, 01 Jun 2008 02:49:04 +0000

FilmThreat.com reviews this 10-minute gem from Neverthought Films:

“The Toaster That Toasted The Golden Toast” actually isn’t as serious a film as the name implies, which is a pretty telling statement.

In this absurd 10-minute short by writer/director/producer Danny Bourque (a University of New Orleans student filmmaker), two slackers stumble upon a magical toaster while shopping in a thrift store. The toaster, which has the power to turn any bread, muffin or bagel into gold, is the store’s prized possession - it was not intended for purchase.

The guys who acquired the toaster, upon realizing their good fortune, immediately begin buying bulk quantities of white bread. The irritated shopkeeper discovers it was sold by accident and sends out a devastating pair of henchmen (one kung fu master, one sumo wrestler) to reclaim it.

The jewel of the movie is a silly chase scene and dramatic rooftop fight sequence. While certainly not the only rooftop fight scene in motion picture history, the climax in “The Toaster That Toasted The Golden Toast” may in fact be the only one that prominently involves a toaster in the action. It’s a wonderfully shot scene, full of quick cuts and epic brawling that would make Chuck Norris proud.

The film even drops a lesson at the end as the shopkeeper, a petite but powerful woman, reminds her rivals that with great power comes great responsibility.

Bizarre? Sure. Funny? Yep. And it goes well with butter, margarine or jam.

Dr. Toast Live @ Raindance

drtoast — Sun, 01 Jun 2008 02:32:16 +0000

Friday, June 20 - Sunday, June 22, 2008 - “Three day forest adventure on a 300 acre private campground * dancing * swimming * camping * hiking * learning * laughing * celebrating life. Dance all night under stars, giant redwooods, swim and rock the pool party by day, learn something new at the visionary forums. Music by Benga & Skream * Lawgiverz * Bassbin Twins * Nyxyss (Haj -Subswara & Hannah Thiem) * EPROM * An-Ten-Nae * The Phat Conductor * Mozaic * Little John * Kitty-D * Majitope * Mancub * Mr Rodgers * Aaron JAE * Digital Honey * Mr. Projectile * Shawna * Laura * EL *Timonkey * Rob Monroy * Dr. Toast * Dov *Audiovoid * and much, much more.” Dr. Toast plays on Friday evening! Tickets, Event Info.